Closed Captioning available in English, French, and Spanish. Transcripts also available here: English, French, Spanish

(chattering)

Offscreen person 1: Got it?
Offscreen person 2: Got it!

(clapper claps)

Offscreen person 2: Thank you!
Offscreen person 1 (referencing clapper): That was a really weak clap, but…
Offscreen person 2: That’s fine.

Ray: OK, ready babe?
Goddess Ixchel (offscreen): Mm.
Ray (speaking through door): OK, so I’m just, gonna like, grab the phone, and just like let you know to come in and that’ll be your cue. OK.

(Ray closes door.)

Offscreen voice 1: Ready…?
Offscreen voice 3: Yeah. So stand back a little more towards the middle… OK… and yeah, you’re looking towards the thing…Alrighty. We’re just gonna grab focus.

(Fade to black. Fade to 2-shot of Ray and Goddess Ixchel.)

Ray: How did you enjoy the shoot today?

Goddess Ixchel: I… really liked it, it was a lot of fun. I, um, was a little nervous, cause it’s kinda just like, impromptu (unintelligible) but that’s that and like, not what a lot of people are looking for in porn anyway, the conversation part

(Ray laughs)

Goddess Ixchel: So…

Ray: Yeah, I mean I guess we could have actually like had some practice conversations

Goddess Ixchel: It’s OK

Ray: the like, 40 hours we were in the car (laughs)

Goddess Ixchel: Well. Shit happens.

Ray: Yeah.

(Both laugh.)

Goddess Ixchel: (unintelligible)

Ray: Um. I…Um…I was a little, a little nervous too, but once we actually, like, were shooting which caught me off guard because I’d never been nervous shooting before, but, I’d never shot with a partner before.

Goddess Ixchel: Mm.

Ray: So. I think it was like slipping into slightly different but really similar personas?

(Both laugh)

Goddess Ixchel: Yeah…that’s true…

Ray: It’s Interesting.

Goddess Ixchel: It is pretty interesting…somethin’…

(Fade to black. Fade to Goddess Ixchel and Ray in bed together)

Goddess Ixchel: We’ll just take these off…

Ray: Hm!

Goddess Ixchel: Get onto your stomach.

Ray: Are you wearing something under this?

Goddess Ixchel: I am.

(Goddess Ixchel takes off her shirt)

Ray: Wow.

Goddess Ixchel: A wonderland.

(Fade to 2-shot interview)

Goddess Ixchel: Was there anything that was like hard for you during the shoot?

Ray: Um… (sighs) I mean, the usual of like, not always projecting my voice the way I probably should be, and then like trying to remind myself to do that. But, I mean, once we got started like, I dunno, I don’t think it was challenging so much as like, um…well I guess the most challenging part was, like, the pace. Like we had to go fairly quickly because there was like, y’know, a limited shoot window and I’m not used to like, changing things up that fast (laughs). We didn’t do that many different things but it was still felt like, it still felt like we only did each thing for like a really short, I was surprised that I came, honestly. I thought it was going to take me too long (unintelligible. Goddess Ixchel laughs.) Which I guess like, it, it occurred to me that we should have discussed that earlier and you could’ve just like, not let me come, but then I ended up coming anyway so it worked.

Goddess Ixchel: It did work out. For me I was, um, I didn’t think about my mumbling and stuff, which, probably should have before now, but, ce la vie. I was…my left leg cramped up a couple of times…

Ray: Oh no!!

Goddess Ixchel: And I was like wait, should I exercise my right to hold or what (laughs) like I didn’t want to be the one to like, who was like (unintelligible)

Ray: When we were in the side position? No.

Goddess Ixchel: No, it was, um, when, when you first like started fisting me? Or no, it was when, when you went down on me while you were fingering me.

Ray: Oh, OK.

Goddess Ixchel: And you were like trying to stretch me out the

Ray: Mm-hmm

Goddess Ixchel: Like this whole leg started cramping up. That’s why I, like, that’s when I lifted, the first time I lifted my knee?

(Ray laughs. Unintelligible)

Goddess Ixchel: That’s when I was just like ‘ugh! My hips! (unintelligible) But I’m just gonna let you keep doing what you’re doing cause it was fun. And I was like, ‘nah, it’s OK. If it, if it last for, like a full minute or something, or like I end up falling on that leg ‘cause I can’t move it then we’ll have to, I’ll have to stretch it out.

Ray: Mm-hmm. Well I’m glad your leg is feeling better now.

Goddess Ixchel: It is.

Ray: That’s good.

Goddess Ixchel: good.

Ray: Glad we worked that out (laughs)

(fade to porn scene; Goddess Ixchel facing the camera)

Goddess Ixchel: (unintelligible) meet again…

Ray: May I go inside you?

Goddess Ixchel: You may.

Ray (whispers): Thank you goddess.

Goddess Ixchel: (moans.)

Ray: So good.

Goddess Ixchel: (moans. Unintelligible.)

(cut to interview 2-shot)

Ray: so yeah, what are your safe sex practices anyway?

Goddess Ixchel: I…um. Like condoms, because they’re easier to clean up. And it helps with the transference and whatnot. If you have condoms for the toys, then you don’t necessarily need to wash the entire toy between like, switching positions.

Ray: Right. Yeah.

Goddess: If we wanted to like trade the toy off between strap-ons or something like, condom-condom. Which is great.

Ray: Yeah.

Goddess Ixchel: And um. Gloves are great for that reason too. I get a lot of hang nails and stuff, so. I like that.

Ray: Mmhm. If I was with somebody else I guess I would have used more safe sex practices, or I would have used gloves. Because… somehow on the way here I scratched my hand. And like it happened between getting out of the car and getting in here (laughs) I have no idea how. But.

Goddess Ixchel: Yeah, that’s (unintelligible)

Ray: But, yeah. We are fluid-bonded and…

Goddess Ixchel: We talked about it first. Conversation first is a big part of…

Ray: Yeah.

Goddess Ixchel: Safe sex for sure. And all the conversation that we had during the shoot was really, like…we do, we do (unintelligible) about communication.

Ray: We do more usually (laughs)

Goddess Ixchel: Yeah, actually.

Ray: Yeah.

Goddess Ixchel: It’s true. We talk more.

Ray: (unintelligible) like…stopped. To have a conversation and laugh about some things and then be like, ‘oh yeah. we’re having sex, let’s finish doing that. (Laughs.) But uh…yeah, so like. Actually that like…I dunno, I feel like that connects both to like, back to our conversation about safe sex and about, um, the challenges. Because it was challenging, uh, to—

Goddess Ixchel: Talking

Ray: Yeah, to communicate like…the way that we did, cause we have to like communicate within these personas but, um. I could see you like doing things for me and I could see you like, like,

(Crosstalk. Ray laughs).

Ray: not using the usual pet names.

Goddess Ixchel: Yeah.

Ray: And I was like I wish I had just told you it’s fine to use pet names, and it’s OK. But the reason why I think that connects to safe sex is because, um, like, I mean “safer” sex isn’t just about physical health. It’s about like emotional health too. And like…Like you were saying, the communication thing is vital, I think it’s important for like sex to be emotionally safe.

Goddess Ixchel: Right.

Ray: And…I already feel emotionally safe with you.

Goddess Ixchel: That’s good. I’m glad. Beware.

(fade to scene. Goddess Ixchel getting fisted. Heavy breathing, moaning.)

(fade to interview)

Ray: So why are you into doing porn?

Goddess Ixchel: I am into porn because I am a sexual fiend.

(Both laugh.)

Goddess Ixchel: I um, I’ve always been very, um, sexually driven, but it’s been an entire saga-journey that I can’t get into right now, but—

(Ray laughs)

Goddess Ixchel: —I, um, I believe that sex work is a healing practice. And I’m a healer.

Ray: Mm-hm.

Goddess Ixchel: So that’s why I’m here.

Ray: I guess I do it cause I’ve always, since I discovered that porn was a thing, uh like in the ‘90s, I was like, when I discovered the internet and I was like, (whispers:) ’what is this!!’ And I always wanted to do porn. Since then. And then uh, you know I’ve, mostly I’ve actually done like, just like, still photos? Photoshoots? But I’ve done a few videos. I actually looked into videos further. And I don’t think I’m going to actually continue to do porn. Um. Because I feel like I’ve had a good run. And (laughs) and I’m pretty happy with what I’ve accomplished. And I really wanna like, when I, um, the whole process of advertising for myself and um, and like trying to find work in whatever part of the country I happen to be living in, and all of that, it’s, it’s a lot of time and energy. Um. It’s one thing when you already have the connections. When I lived on the West coast it was easier, but now that I live in the Southeast I feel like I would have to completely rebuild my connections and all of this and it’s just, I…got to focus on this for a long time and, for like 10 years, and it’s been really great. And…now I wanna like shift my focus back to my writing. But I’ll write the hell out of some erotica.

Goddess Ixchel: That’ll be great.

Ray: Yeah. (Crosstalk) And I mean we do have your, uh, your graphic novel that comic series.

Goddess Ixchel: Yes. That is something that I want to do.

Ray: Uh huh. So.

Goddess Ixchel: I’m just getting—

Ray: Still do things without me having to be in videos. But. No I mean now that I’m officially, out-loud, on record said that I’m not going to be doing porn anymore who knows if it’ll actually work out (laughs).

Goddess Ixchel: Interesting. I’m, I’m definitely open to more I feel like I’m just getting started. This feels like a debutante thing almost…debut…

Ray: Mm-hmm.

Goddess Ixchel: It’s kinda fun. I um, I’m learning how to navigate all the…(sighs) everything. And, really the hardest part for me has been just working within myself and finding out what I’m comfortable with. Ethically, and where I stand on the spectrum and who I am, because sex as it is is its own entity and the industry is very orchestrated for…just…very marginalized, small amount of people and catering to the, like, the majority is catering to like cis…males.

Ray: Mm.

Goddess Ixchel: Y’know? So. For me, I had to try to transform my whole, just…life and idea around how I wanted to exist within that space, because I didn’t want to become this barbie doll and look like every other black barbie

Ray: Yeah.

Goddess Ixchel: Like I definitely am more beautiful in my natural state than when I’m trying to put on a different face. The awkwardness just shines through because I can’t be fake, I just end up giving stank face and—

Ray: (laughs)

Goddess Ixchel: Looking not like me because I don’t like them. So. When I’m comfortable in my own skin then I can totally lie to people way better

Ray: (laughs)

Goddess Ixchel: It’s great. (Laughs)

Ray: It’s good.

(Both laugh)

Goddess Ixchel: I’m looking forward to doing more stuff and, you know, all the fun, consensual, especially kinky things.

Ray: Yeah! I wanna…

Goddess Ixchel: Kinky (unintelligible)

Ray: I wanna do more porn with you, um, which I guess if I was gonna do more porn it would be with you, uh…I think I would wanna do, um, definitely more kinky stuff, play with my masochism more, because like we didn’t really have time to get into it today, like we just kinda like featured it a little bit, but I’m a pretty hard-core masochist! So… (laughs) We’ve just been…like…

(crosstalk)

Ray: We’ve been, like, like having sex for a year now and, like we still haven’t figured out where my limits are. So like. We get close and then we’re like, “oh.”

Goddess Ixchel: “I’m tired.”

Ray: “I’m tired we need to stop now.” (laughs.) Not, “oh the pain is too much” it’s “oh, my arm is cramping, ok, well, we should stop.” (laughs) Um. But yeah, I’ve never really played with kink on camera before. Um. Most of what I’ve done has been a little more vanilla and so, like. We kept it pretty vanilla for this shoot too I think but, um. Just like, intro-ing a little is like, tempting me back. It’s like, ‘maybe you do want to do more porn…’

(Both laugh)

Goddess Ixchel: See the wheels turning

Ray: The wheels turning, but (whispers) I’m gonna focus on my writing.

Goddess Ixchel: Well, you can help me work on my sexual graphic novel

Ray: Yes.

Goddess Ixchel: For all my live-action stuff that’s going to be the, you know, then I can get the like, the tentacle and alien stuff in—

Ray: (laughs) yes.

Goddess Ixchel: ‘cause that’s easier to draw than like, ‘act out.’

Ray: Yeah. I can help write the story lines.

(fade to scene. Goddess Ixchel using vibrator over Ray.)

Ray: Oh fuck…

(Goddess Ixchel squirts on Ray. Ray moans. Fade to interview.)

Ray: (unintelligible. Non-word mouth sounds.) I think…um…something that has been on my mind, um, about the industry and about, um, CrashPad specifically and why I like working with CrashPad and the kind of work that I do wanna support in the industry, whether I’m doing it or supporting it in another way…um…is that like having me displaying, like, physically and emotionally safe sex, and having…um…really like woke and real conversations about sex…y’know, porn is oftentimes one of the first things that people go to when they’re learning about sex when they’re young, um, or in their like, y’know these young adults and whatnot, they’re, they’re figuring it out through the only—cause we don’t have a comprehensive sex ed program, in our country especially. So like, you know, young people…like, coming into adulthood, trying to figure out who they are sexually and what sex is supposed to look like, what sex is supposed to mean…having actual positive examples instead of all this toxic shit that they have that’s like, out there on the internet which is like 90 percent of porn on the internet is like super toxic and gross.

Goddess Ixchel: Right.

Ray: So having more like, um…porn that shows sex the way it should be?

Goddess Ixchel: Yeah.

Ray: And like healthy sexual dynamics? Um—

Goddess Ixchel: That’s important to me too

Ray: Yeah. Super important.

Goddess Ixchel: Still like way too much of media is perpetuating and encouraging rape culture. So actually visualizing and actualizing and verbalizing full consent and what that looks like and giving folks the tools when all you have is like google and porn to figure out anything about your body, when you’re fucking 12 years old…

Ray: Mm-hmm.

Goddess Ixchel: Being able to stumble upon something where it’s like, ‘oh they actually have a conversation, and they seem to be exchanging more than just like physical touches! Hm!’ Like maybe I should consider that, like, having an emotional connection

Ray: Connection, yeah. With someone.

Goddess Ixchel: Mm-hmm!