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Crash Pad Blog

Hail to the Porn Titans (a.k.a. 8 Reasons I Loved the 100th Episode)


The Jiz Lee Nina Hartley 100th Crash Pad Series episode is exquisite.  And here are my reasons why, expressed in list form.  Because really, how could I write anything more sophisticated with my hand down my pants?

  1. The femme gets called “Sir.” Okay, so I don’t know how Hartley identifies.  And I get peeved whenever people call me femme.  But if we put Jiz and Nina together on a spectrum, traditionally masculine being on one end and traditionally feminine being on the other…well, actually, probably both of them would end up in the middle somewhere. But in comparison, Nina would be farther on the femme side than Jiz.  And I love that kind of gender fuckery. It mirrors my own desires and I love seeing porn that is relatable.  And it promotes fluid gender even if you pass as “straight.”  Freedom for all!
  2. “I can come whenever?” Okay, so Jiz Lee is adorable, this we know.  And they also do some adorable dirty talking.  I just about melted when she asked Nina “Sir, can I come whenever?”  Such a cute D/s dynamic.  I never thought cute and D/s would appear in the same sentence…that reflects my own prejudices about that particular brand of play.  I always think it has to be serious.  And this from the person that writes about sexual misadventures.
  3. Jiz comes with jack-in-the-box reflexes with just as much fun an entertainment. Even for Jiz, this ejaculation was epic.  It was the superman of ejaculations.  Nina punched their bits and wham, it was like a fountain at Versailles. I love seeing that.  Ejaculation, when it comes to vagina-bodied beings, is so rarely talked about.  To see it up close and personal with a close-up kicks ass!  Now, I’ve never been able to do it, but this episode sure as hell made me want to try.
  4. These are a few of my favorite things. Cocks and fisting.  Can an episode really go wrong when it involves both of those fond sex acts/objects?
  5. Representin’! This episode, the fact that it’s the 100th episode, represents a trend in the world.  Queer sex is hot, queer visibility is in, and ethical porn is what rises to the top.  This production company is a 100 percent success story.  And this is not only attributed to the sexy time, but to what this company really stands for.
  6. The acting rocks! Have I ever told you that I’m trained as an actor?  Well I am.  Meisner technique, look it up (for those of you that know what that means, I promise I’m only bat shit in the good ways.)  And the acting is lightyears above and beyond anything else I’ve seen.  They truly connected with each other, let the awkward parts be awkward, listened to what each other had to say, what their bodies were saying, embraced their characters fully, had a clear point of view about each other, reacted truthfully to each other and the circumstances (both real and imaginary)…need I continue?
  7. They live streamed it! I know Shine and Pink and White have had tech trouble in the past with live streamed events.  Congratulations!  The only thing that went wrong with this one was sweet chipmunk voices.  And that was only after the sexy time!  A triumph.  I bet you all work so hard on the logistics.  Now I missed it, but it’s still superb.  Congratulations again.
  8. Um…it’s Jiz Lee and Nina Hartley. I mean, hell…can you say dykons?  I love writing about anything with Jiz Lee in it because they’re such a sweetheart.  And they’re damn sexy.  And they’re damn good at what they do.  And Nina?  Well she’s a crazy sex-pot porn icon, and a mainstream mole for the queer community!

All in all, it is worth an entire month’s membership just to see this episode.  It’s history and it’s sex ed and it’s socially responsible consumerism.  If you can’t afford it, just sigh over the pretty pictures and tweet fan-phrases at them.  Show your appreciation.  Hail to the porn Titans.


“I never thought cute and D/s would appear in the same sentence…that reflects my own prejudices about that particular brand of play. I always think it has to be serious.”

I totally get what you’re saying here. D/s play can be a lot of fun, but I thought I really couldn’t keep a straight face enough to do it. (I mean, I am a goofy nerd.) It’s so great to see Jiz work, be cute and awkward and all while still sticking with the D/s scene. – Vid Tuesday


D/s isn’t something I have a lot of experience in, but it is widely believed that I couldn’t pull that kind of play off because I’m too silly. Hearing that others also seem to have this perception/concern kinda makes me wanna try it. :0) – madeofwords


“Thank you SO much! I’ve had a thing for Jiz from the moment I met them. We had a fantastic time when we worked together at the Masturbate-a-Thon, 2010 and I knew I had found someone with whom I can make quality smut for a long, long, time. We are both dancers (though they are much better than I), both switchy (they’re one of the few female-bodied people toward whom I feel at all subby), both understand that truthful representations of Queer sexuality are valuable, and needed.”

“Oh, yes, they’re HOT! I just wanna wrassle with them all the time! Woof!”

“I also loved that they called me “Sir,” as I was wearing their favorite dick. I identify as a heterosexual butch dyke, married to a heterosexual butch Queen. I play from the femme/sub role when we play alone but when we have guests I put on my dick and Dehners and get my boy on. At work I put on my femme costume so the mainstream folks won’t tune out my message of sexual liberationism. I loved the D/s energy. It was just enough to make me want more of it with them.”

“Oh, yes, and punching their front hole after fisting it (fisting and impact play being two of my favorite things) just made my day!”

“Thanks again for noticing what you did, and sharing it.”

“Last thing: thanks for recognizing my work as a mole! Y’all work from the outside and I’ll work from the inside and we’ll tunnel under the wall!”

Nina Hartley


Ha! Yay moles! Good for tunneling. :0)

Thank you so much for reading, it was a pleasure to view and review your work. I hope you keep hitting up the Crash Pad! It’ll certainly make for great blogging for the rest of us.

Also…love your use of the word wrassle. Woof indeed! :0) – madeofwords


Originally posted on May 28, 2011 by guest blogger Made of Words.




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